I got a red card and was informed I had to talk to the Intramural office before I could play again. I went in to talk to them multiple times, but they were never there. In their defense, I didn’t make an appointment. I ended up missing the rest of that soccer season. I think I missed 3 games total. Not a big deal.
That little scuffle was two years ago. A lot has happened since then. I have toned down my aggressiveness in sports. I grew a beard and shaved it. The Miami Heat acquired LeBron James and Chris Bosh, promised they would win 8 championships, and then lost to the Mavericks in the NBA Finals. I worked in the ghettos of South Chicago for AMP Security (which screwed me out of money, but that’s another story). I met Kelly Hightower (he’s actually a boy. Crazy huh?!). I worked at Anasazi and changed my outlook on a lot of things. A lot had changed in my life.
But none of that mattered to BYU. Rules were made to be followed regardless of the situation.
I wanted to sign up for another intramural team, but before the season started, I wanted to make sure that BYU wouldn’t try suspend me for something I did–and missed games for–two years ago.
I called the Intramural office and went in and talked to them. I went into the office of one of the director dudes and we talked about what happened. I said exactly what happened and told him I knew it was wrong and that I’ve already missed games for it so I just wanted to get this talk over with and be able to play. He proceeded to give me a lecture about the seriousness of the situation. I honestly felt like he was trying to hear himself talk like a Bishop. He also told me that I received 2 other red cards (which I was not informed of ) in the same game. I told him they never told me about those (they were for threatening another player and swearing), but he could care less–he is too busy following every rule ever invented.
I started out saying all the things that I thought that he wanted to hear, but that didn’t last long. He told me he would have to meet with the other directors (I don’t know what they are called) and figure out what my suspension would be and that I should count on at least a one game suspension.
Ex-squeeze me? A-Baking powder? (Waynes World reference)
“Wait, why should I be suspended at all if this happened 2 years ago and I missed games then??”
“Well, it just has to happen.”
“Why does it have to happen? Is there a rule or policy that says so?’
“No, it is a serious offense and that requires a serious punishment.”
“So, if there is no rule that says I have to be suspended, you’re basically telling me that you want to me to not play. Right?”
“No. It just has to be this way.”
“No it doesn’t. You want it to be this way. Or else you’d say “time served, lesson learned, have fun. But have the BYU mentality of enforcing every little thing even when it doesn’t apply.”
“It just needs to happen. We just want everyone to have fun.”
“You also don’t want me to play thus not allowing me to have fun.”
We went on to discuss some other things like me having to pay to be suspended. Why would I pay money and not play? I don’t know if he grasped that argument. At one point in the conversation he told me I was ticking him off (I think it was when I was ripping on the refs for not doing anything). One last time I asked him if he would just not suspend me. Nope.
I left and got a refund.
A couple weeks later I got this letter in the mail.
Not only did I get suspended, but I got suspended for the whole semester??? For something I did 2 years ago and missed games for??
I guess that’s what I get for questioning things at BYU and, to quote the late (and sarcastic) Hugh Nibley, “as for the rest, we do not question things at “the BYU”.